I stand before you today – with bleeding ears and a gently weeping guitar – reading this elegy / about a chord whose only sin was being played at the wrong apogee. His compadres knew his inclination for flair / and who can forget the performance when he let loose at the wrong time while the bombs where bursting in the air. But nothing can compare to the moment he did impair a thousand ears. After being warned repeatedly to watch the conductor, he seared in the listeners minds that glaringly dissonant sound, time.. after time.. after time.. Qflarp..! Qflarp..! Qflarp..! I am still in shock that the audience was able to forfeit their way out the doors after the eminently dissonant sound faded to glory…. and the fat lady stood in horror. So it is today, with a resonanting harmony of a thousand voices / that we repose this most dissonant chord with condolences. Goodnight Qflarp, we hope to NEVER hear you again.